Too young to die, too old to live

I just have to get it in my head that there is no rhyme or reason as to how or when a person dies.  I just read how someone's mother died at the age of 46, leaving behind teenagers.  To me, that is heart breaking.  Yet, I spend a lot of time at a nursing home and see people who wish they had died five years ago.  They're hunched over and their faces are almost unrecognizable - not pleasant, not angry, just tired of living and waiting patiently to die. That is also heart breaking. Some of us have sweet, happy children who die.  That is beyond heart breaking.  Then, when I hear about an 80-something person who died and everyone is crazy-sad or shocked or heart broken, I think, Get over it.  Just how long are we supposed to live? What's the acceptable age to die?

I used to hate when I heard the expression 'death is a part of life'.  But now I finally agree.  Death happens every day to all kinds of people.  My husband would get angry hearing about a child or young mother who died but the serial killers and rapists in the prisons seem to live quite a long time.  It's lousy, but there is a reason for it, I am sure;  I just haven't figured it out yet.

I believe we have souls or spirits that last forever and that we come and go through the world to learn and teach lessons.  I still want to punch the idiot who tells the mother that her dead child is now in a better place. (If the mother wants to say it, fine, but nobody better tell a grieving mother that her kid is better off without her.)  So this is all very tricky and confusing. In the meantime, I'm enjoying the company of my friends and family when I'm lucky enough to see them because one day (and it could be tomorrow) they won't be there.